One of the 17.2 AMI readers, Jonathan Baker, recently found out that he has several painful
ulcers in his stomach. Sadly, this has left him unable to work in either of his two jobs as an international sponge designer and feline nail technician for the past seven
weeks.
But there's been an upside. The time off, while painful, has allowed Jonathan to invest more
time in what really matters. Things like - go figure - growing a mustache,
hating Dave Navarro, and dressing as Sarah Jessica Parker and skipping through Manhattan, all the while
being mistaken for a horse. At the same time, he's using his mustache for good - as opposed to
Joseph Stalin who used his for evil - and Jonathan has started a cause, nay, a movement,
called
Mustaches for Ulcers.
Despite the
well-documented correlation between mustaches and ulcers, Jonathan's also rededicated himself to find purpose in life in recruiting others
to grow and proudly wear the labia sebucula (Latin for "lip sweater") in honor of those of us who have painful ulcers.
Route for Jonathan.
Carry on.
About afroman
The name “Abe Froman” is most commonly recognized as the ubiquitous and unseen character who’s identity is briefly assumed by actor Matthew Broderick in the film “Ferris Beuller’s Day Off.” However, Abraham Froman is much more.
Dr. Froman, a Capricorn, began his career with AMI as an intern, and after receiving his certification in nuclear mustacheology in 2006, transitioned his role into the organization’s Director of Logistical Intelligence, focusing on research, government relations, intelligence gathering, grass roots advocacy, and song writing.
On October 25, 2008, he will ascend to the role of Chief Executive Officer.
“I am honored to assume the chair held by Drs. Snor and Perlut previously,” Froman said. “The Mustached American people need leadership, and I pledge that AMI, under my stewardship, will continue to provide it at a time when it is so desperately needed.”
Dr. Froman has said that his future goals for AMI are to create satellite campus’s overseas and to develop an annual event, to be known as "The Million Mustache March," each year in St. Louis, concluding under the world’s largest mustache – St. Louis’ Gateway Arch.
Froman formerly lived in the Chicago area where he ran a museum dedicated to the "Karate Kid" series of films starring the indefatigable Pat Morita.
As Abe likes to say, "One can never tire of Pat Morita."
Dr. Froman is also a periodic contributor to joesportsfan.com.