ADHD is actually a blessing if you harness it correctly as there's nothing quite like a series of unconnected thoughts to brighten the end of the week. That, plus a 24-pack of beer. Cold beer. And maybe a large sausage and extra cheese pizza. Good pizza too. Not like the crap they serve at IMOs in St. Louis. What the hell is provel cheese? If anyone you know from St. Louis ever tells you, "St. Louis pizza is the best!" Kick them in the groin and fly to Chicago or New York.
And with that, a few random musings from the mustache capital of the world:
- Houston Astros steroid freak Miguel Tejada has admitted he lied about his age when signed by the Oakland Athletics back in the day. Man, what a relief. We can all breath more easily now. Steroid freak.
- All right stop. Collaborate and listen. Rob Van Winkle, better known as "Vanilla Ice" got sent to the slammer this week for a beat down on this wife. Maybe he will be put on Ice, Ice, Baby......who the hell knows. All we know is you really can't help but love his signature song.
- We asked our new friends at Bauer-Griffin Online to take down the distasteful Dave Navarro. They responded there was no need. That the knucklehead is doing a pretty good job of it all by himself. I guess he is universally loved.
- The NBA playoffs begin this weekend. I'll be watching, and for the other 11 people who will also be watching, we say, "enjoy!"
- We all heard Charlton Heston died last week. A crying shame. The man had a gun damn it. Now it's being pried out of his cold, dead hands. Regardless, some very famous people were at his funeral including AMI research director Dan Callahan (who grew up with Heston) mustached American traitor John Wilkes Boothe, AMI friend Jesus, and ALF from the popular TV series.
- What the hell is wrong with the once powerful Microsoft? Check out this stupid, stupid video they distributed to their sales staff. Gizmodo had a funny story on it the other day, siting how painful it was to watch. Man, you'd think a company about innovation would be, well, innovative.
- Finally, we here at the Institute love listening to Neil Diamond strum his ditties. Who doesn't? He has a new album coming out, and in a recent article on it, he says it's the most difficult he's ever written. No clue what the hell he's talking about. Just know we're coming to America.....TODAY!
Thanks for bearing with me. ADHD rant officially over.
About afroman
The name “Abe Froman” is most commonly recognized as the ubiquitous and unseen character who’s identity is briefly assumed by actor Matthew Broderick in the film “Ferris Beuller’s Day Off.” However, Abraham Froman is much more.
Dr. Froman, a Capricorn, began his career with AMI as an intern, and after receiving his certification in nuclear mustacheology in 2006, transitioned his role into the organization’s Director of Logistical Intelligence, focusing on research, government relations, intelligence gathering, grass roots advocacy, and song writing.
On October 25, 2008, he will ascend to the role of Chief Executive Officer.
“I am honored to assume the chair held by Drs. Snor and Perlut previously,” Froman said. “The Mustached American people need leadership, and I pledge that AMI, under my stewardship, will continue to provide it at a time when it is so desperately needed.”
Dr. Froman has said that his future goals for AMI are to create satellite campus’s overseas and to develop an annual event, to be known as "The Million Mustache March," each year in St. Louis, concluding under the world’s largest mustache – St. Louis’ Gateway Arch.
Froman formerly lived in the Chicago area where he ran a museum dedicated to the "Karate Kid" series of films starring the indefatigable Pat Morita.
As Abe likes to say, "One can never tire of Pat Morita."
Dr. Froman is also a periodic contributor to joesportsfan.com.