Mustached Americans dig chicks. We especially dig chicks who dig mustaches. And and chicks on wheels who dig mustaches -- Good Lord!

One group of hot, dirty, and relatively delicious of chicks who have great appreciation for people of Mustached American descent are the The Smashinistas, a team in the St. Louis based all-female roller derby league Arch Rival Roller Girls.

The Smashinistas are such lovers of the labia sebucula (Latin for "lip sweater") that the team quasi-mascot is a mustache -- Smashie Stachie. That does not suck.

This Saturday, February 6, in their second game of the season, The Smashinistas will face off against the equally delicious, yet not as nutritious team -- The M-80s. The match will be held at the Upper Deck Sports Bar in St. Louis and promises a tremendous amount of girl-on-girl action.....which does not suck.

Tickets are $10 and kids under ten are free. Afterward, the league hosts a party with the teams with high quality drink and food specials throughout the entire gig.

Tickets are available at the door or via Brown Paper tickets.

Carry on.